Things that end poorly when one or two of something important is missing:

  • Bike rides -> missing some spokes (thud)
  • Skydiving -> missing some parachute lines (THUD!)
  • NFL running back with the ball -> missing some offensive linemen (run)
  • Lion exhibit -> missing some cage bars (RUN!)
  • Choral concert -> missing a single voice (less than awesome)

Yes, a single voice. For the Windward Choral Society’s 100 voices, that’s a 1% decrease for every person not on the risers making a joyful noise. It doesn’t take too many for things to start to fall apart. Let’s say that one person is missing from each voice part. We’ll use round numbers because the Blogmeister failed calculus (and algebra and fractions and long division), so let’s say that we have 10 voices each in the tenor and bass sections and 40 voices each in the alto and soprano sections. And when there’s a division of firsts and seconds (which happens a LOT), we take these groups and divide them by two. So, when it all shakes out, each distinctive and glorious note in that last booming eight-part chord of a song has either 20 women or 5 men siging it.

Okay, I lied. There’s going to be a LITTLE math.

So if a soprano or alto is missing, that lovely note is reduced by 5%. If it’s a tenor or bass? It drops by 20%. Those are both REALLY big numbers. Let’s go back to a couple of our examples up at the top of this whole thing. Take away 5% of my parachute lines and I’m going to make a Blogmeister-shaped crater upon my arrival. 20% of the bars of the cage at the lion exhibit? Call me an appetizer (mmmm…tasty).

Each voice in the choir is different and has its own shape and volume and color and flavor. They combine to make our unique and wonderful sound. There’s no other choir in the world that sounds exactly like us because of all of those differences and nuances (look at it this way…each instrument in an orchestra is different and the collective makes magic; if it was just 25 trombones…well…you get the picture). To bring anything less than that sound to our audience is to be bringing them less than our best and we’ve denied them a little piece of the joy of music that makes us tick.

No matter who you are, no matter how weak or powerful or soft or strong your voice is, we really CAN’T do it without you.

Let the concerts commence!

(And just for some silliness, a list of other things that would suck if there was 20% less of them.)

  • A frosty cold bottle would contain only 9.6 ounces of beer. Sacrilege.
  • Shaq would be 5’6” tall.
  • The “Hallelujah Chorus” would come to a screeching halt somewhere around, “Foooor the Lord God omnipo…” screech. Done.
  • The 2-minute warning of a football game would come 1 minute into the 4th quarter.
  • 100% of the hot air balloons in the world would stay firmly on the ground for lack of air.
  • The alphabet would end at the letter “T”. Think of the carnage in the dictionary.
  • The “12 Days of Christmas” would no longer contain lords a-leaping, pipers piping or drummers drumming and would be significantly shorter. Actually, that’s not so bad…
  • “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” would start at 79 and would be significantly shorter. Hmmmm…that’s not so bad either.