This little bit of silliness was the result of a conversation with a co-worker around flying (a passion of mine) where he tossed out this little nugget from the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy: “There is an art to flying, or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. … Clearly, it is this second part, the missing, that presents the difficulties.” Simple and tough to disagree with, just hard to do.
With a full orchestra joining us for the June concert I thought it might be interesting to see what kind of fun I could have with quotes pertaining to instruments. I was right, it WAS fun.
“It’s easy to play any musical instrument: all you have to do is touch the right key at the right time and the instrument will play itself.” – Johann Sebastian Bach
“I’ve played every instrument you could possibly think of for 10 minutes. So I’m mediocre at everything. I can play drums, guitar, piano, violin, saxophone, clarinet, flute… Just not well.” – Kat Dennings
“I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out.” – Jay London
(Two for the price of one…) “Accordion, noun: An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.”
“The clarinet is a musical instrument the only thing worse than which is two.” – Ambrose Bierce
“The Harmonica is the world’s best-selling musical instrument. You’re welcome.” – Bob Dylan
“Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.” – Samuel Butler
“Rock is about finding who you are. You don’t necessarily have to play your instrument very well at all. You can just barely get by and you can be in a rock band.” – Gene Simmons
(Kind of following along the same thread…) “I despise people who revel in the ignorance of not being able to play their instrument.” – Robert Smith
“When you play the 12-string guitar, you spend half your life tuning the instrument and the other half playing it out of tune.” – Pete Seeger (Ain’t THAT the truth…)
“So the whole basis for jazz music is based on the fact that the bass player could not play his instrument.” – Miroslav Vitous
“If you think a chain saw is a musical instrument…
…you might be a redneck.” – Jeff Foxworthy
“So I had a couple of years of playing trumpet. I really enjoyed it, but it was not the kind of instrument you could whip out at a party. Let’s face it.” – Jackson Browne
(And for our dear Susie…) “Why would you want to stand there waving a stick when you could be playing an instrument?” – Nigel Kennedy
Snicker…y’all be safe out there.